I cook food for a living. Lots of different food. I bake cakes, I grill steaks, and pour milk in your bowl of corn flakes. But today I heard a comment left on my friend Emeril's dish into The link is somewhere on Google, if you are interested. But anyways, some idiot made a retarded comment on Emeril's Fricassee Chicken Dish...AND I QUOTE!!!

"this is amazing man i mean even Subway couldn't produce this"

Has it really come to this? Like seriously, are all meals, especially chicken based, being deemed as "Subway worthy?" Is that the new criteria for what makes something good or not? Whether it is like some Subway meal?

Because if so, I'm done. I'm done forever with food in every fashion. Not just as a chef, but as a cooker/server, and as an eater (hello anorexia!). Because the simple notion that Subway based off of a bunch of half-decent chicken and steak sandwiches is the new culinary standard bothers me.

What really gets me is the fact that now people are running around pretending they know everything about chicken and steak. Quiznos is now a household name for hipster fags and little thirteen year olds. I won't take anything away from Quiznos, they are talented at making sandwhices. And I like a few of their combos. But why is it people laughed at me 4 years ago when I said I liked this restaurant, and now they are the "new industry standard" for chicken.

Oh and I swear if I hear one more time that Rachel Ray or Martha Stewart is better than Emeril Lagasse or Alton Brown, because they are on Oprah, I'm gonna start raping fatass McDonald kids left and right. And I don't mean the good kind of rape(not that any rape is good, of course) I mean the kind of rape where even Kobe Bryant is asking himself ,"You're not white?!" *Did I just accidentally, and indirectly suggest that there is a GOOD form of rape in this paragraph?!* Why yes, I, or you, did indeed.

And since when has it been "fashionable" to where restaraunt t-shirts. I'm so sick of seeing kiddies running around in Joe's CrabShack t-shirts, and when you ask them about the restaurant they can't even name one dish by the place.

I miss the days when chicken and steak were not fashionable. I miss the days when we judged music(food) based on how it actually tasted, and how healthy it was, not whether it was the latest Five Dollar footlong sub or not. To be honest, I miss being able to take people seriously when discussing food with them, especially steak and chickenl.

On a related note, go eat the meals of my favorite professional chefs...

Emeril Lagasse
Alton Brown
Hisao Odachi
Paula Deen
Bobby Flay

Yea, I can list countless reasons why these chefs are better than your favorite chefs. But if you can't figure out why just by just eating yourself, then it isn't worth my time trying to explain it. You are just not as evolved in my culinary tastes as I am, what a shame.

Last but not least, BAM!